英语话剧剧本Pygmalion

英语话剧剧本pygmalion

acti

coventgardenat11.15p.m.torrentsofheavysummerrain.cabwhistlelowingfranticallyinalldirectio.pedestriaruingforshelterintothemarketandundertheporticoofst.paul’schurch,wheretherearealreadyseveralpeople,amongthemaladyandherdaughterineveningdre.theyareallpeeringoutgloomilyattherain,exceptonemanwithhiackturnedtotherest,whoseemswhollypreoccupiedwithanotebookinwhichheiswritingbusily.thechurchclockstrikesthefirstquarter.

thedaughter

[intheacebetweenthecentralpillars,closetotheoneonherleft]i’mgettingchilledtothebone.whatcanfreddybedoingallthistime?heeengonetwentyminutes.

themother

[onherdaughter’sright]notsolong.butheoughttohavegotusacaythis.

abystander

[onthelady’sright]hewontgetnocaotuntilhalf-pasteleven,mius,whentheycomebackafterdroingtheirtheatrefares.

themother

butwemusthaveacab.wecantstandhereuntilhalf-pasteleven.it’stoobad.

thebystander

well,itaintmyfault,mius.

thedaughter

iffreddyhadabitofgumption,hewouldhavegotoneatthetheatredoor.

themother

whatcouldhehavedone,poorboy?

thedaughter

otherpeoplegotca.whycouldnthe?

freddyrushesinoutoftherainfromthesouthamptotreetside,andcomeetweenthemclosingadriingumbrella.heisayoungmanoftwenty,ineveningdre,verywetaroundtheankles.

thedaughter

well,havntyougotacab?

freddy

thereotonetobehadforloveormoney.

themother

oh,freddy,theremustbeone.youcanthavetried.

thedaughter

it’stootiresome.doyouexpectustogoandgetoneourselves?

freddy

itellyoutheyreallengaged.therainwaosudden:nobodywarepared;andeverybodyhadtotakeacab.ivebeentocharingcroonewayandnearlytoludgatecircustheother;andtheywereallengaged.

themother

didyoutrytrafalgarsquare?

freddy

therewatoneattrafalgarsquare.

thedaughter

didyoutry?

freddy

itriedasfarascharingcrotation.didyouexpectmetowalktohammersmith?

thedaughter

youhavnttriedatall.

themother

youreallyareveryhelple,freddy.goagaianddontcomebackuntilyouhavefoundacab.

freddy

ishallsimplygetsoakedfornothing.

thedaughter

andwhataboutus?arewetostayhereallnightinthisdraught,withnexttonothingon.youselfishpig--

freddy

oh,verywell:i’llgo,i’llgo.[heopehisumbrellaanddashesoffstrandwards,butcomesintocollisionwithaflowergirl,whoishurryinginforshelter,knockingherbasketoutofherhands.ablindingflashoflightning,followeditantlybyarattlingpealofthunder,orchestratestheincident].

theflowergirl

nahthen,freddy:lookwh’y’gowin,deah.

freddy

sorry[herushesoff].

theflowergirl

[pickingupherscatteredflowersandreplacingtheminthebasket]theresmeersf’yer!te-oobanchesovoyletstrodintothemad.[shesitsdownontheplinthofthecolumn,sortingherflowers,onthelady’sright.sheiotatallanattractiveperson.sheierhaeighteen,perhatwenty,hardlyolder.shewearsalittlesailorhatofblackstrawthathaslongbeenexposedtothedustandsootoflondonandhaeldomifeverbeerushed.herhairneedswashingratherbadly:itsmousycolorcanhardlybenatural.shewearsashoddyblackcoatthatreacheearlytoherkneesandihapedtoherwaist.shehasabrowkirtwithacoarseapron.herbootsaremuchtheworseforwear.sheiodoubtascleanahecanaffordtobeutcomparedtotheladieheisverydirty.herfeaturesarenoworsethantheiruttheirconditionleaveomethingtobedesired;andsheneedstheservicesofadentist].

themother

howdoyouknowthatmyson’ameisfreddy,pray?

theflowergirl

ow,eezye-ooasan,ise?wal,fewddany’de-ootybawmzamathershould,eednowbetterntoawlaporegel’sflahrznthanranawyathahtpyin.willye-oopymef’them?[here,withapologies,thisdeerateattempttorepresentherdialectwithoutaphoneticalphabetmustbeabandonedasunintelligibleoutsidelondon.]

thedaughter

donothingofthesort,mother.theidea!

themother

pleaseallowme,clara.haveyouanypeies?

thedaughter

no.i’venothingsmallerthaixpence.

theflowergirl

[hopefully]icangiveyouchangeforataer,kindlady.

themother

[toclara]giveittome.[clarapartsreluctantly].now[tothegirl]thisisforyourflowers.

theflowergirl

thankyoukindly,lady.

thedaughter

makehergiveyouthechange.thesethingsareonlyapeyabunch.

themother

doholdyourtongue,clara.[tothegirl].youcankeepthechange.

theflowergirl

oh,thankyou,lady.

themother

nowtellmehowyouknowthatyounggentleman’ame.

theflowergirl

ididnt.

themother

iheardyoucallhimbyit.donttrytodeceiveme.

theflowergirl

[protesting]whostryingtodeceiveyou?icalledhimfreddyorcharliesameasyoumightyourselfifyouwastalkingtoastrangerandwishedtobepleasant.[shesitsdowesideherbasket].

thedaughter

sixpencethrownaway!really,mamma,youmighthavearedfreddythat.[sheretreatsindisgustbehindthepillar].

anelderlygentlemanoftheamiablemilitarytyperushesintoshelter,andclosesadriingumbrella.heisinthesameplightasfreddy,verywetabouttheankles.heisineveningdre,withalightovercoat.hetakestheplaceleftvacantbythedaughter’sretirement.

thegentleman

phew!

themother

[tothegentleman]oh,sir,isthereanysignofittoing?

thegentleman

i’mafraidnot.itstartedworsethaneverabouttwominutesago.[hegoestotheplinthbesidetheflowergirlutsuphisfootonit;andstoototurndownhistrouserends].

themother

oh,dear![sheretireadlyandjoiherdaughter].

theflowergirl

[takingadvantageofthemilitarygentleman’roximitytoestablishfriendlyrelatiowithhim].ifit’sworseit’sasignit’earlyover.socheerup,captaiandbuyafloweroffapoorgirl.

thegentleman

i’msorry,ihavntanychange.

theflowergirl

icangiveyouchange,captain.

thegentlemen

forasovereign?ivenothingle.

theflowergirl

garn!ohdobuyafloweroffme,captain.icanchangehalf-a-crown.takethisfortuence.

thegentleman

nowdontbetroublesome:theresagoodgirl.[tryinghiockets]ireallyhavntanychange--stop:heresthreehapence,ifthatsanyusetoyou[heretreatstotheotherpillar].

theflowergirl

[disaointed,butthinkingthreehalfpencebetterthaothing]thankyou,sir.

thebystander

[tothegirl]youbecareful:givehimaflowerforit.theresablokeherebehindtakingdowneverybleedwordyouresaying.[allturntothemanwhoistakingnotes].

theflowergirl

[ringingupterrified]iaintdonenothingwrongbyeakingtothegentleman.ivearighttosellflowersifikeepoffthekerb.[hysterically]i’mareectablegirl:sohelpme,ineveroketohimexcepttoaskhimtobuyafloweroffme.[generalhuub,mostlysympathetictotheflowergirl,butdeprecatingherexceiveseibility.criesofdontstarthollerin.whoshurtingyou?nobody’sgoingtotouchyou.whatsthegoodoffuing?steadyon.easy,easy,etc.,comefromtheelderlystaidectators,whopathercomfortingly.leatientoneidhershutherhead,oraskherroughlywhatiswrongwithher.aremotergroup,notknowingwhatthematteris,crowdinandincreasethenoisewithquestionandawer:whatstherow?whatshedo?whereishe?atectakingherdown.what!him?yes:himoverthere:tookmoneyoffthegentleman,etc.theflowergirl,distraughtandmoed,breaksthroughthemtothegentleman,cryingwildly]oh,sir,dontlethimchargeme.youduowhatitmeatome.theylltakeawaymycharacteranddrivemeonthestreetsforeakingtogentlemen.they--

thenotetaker

[comingforwardonherright,therestcrowdingafterhim]there,there,there,there!whoshurtingyou,yousillygirl?whatdoyoutakemefor?

thebystander

it’sallright:hesagentleman:lookathioots.[explainingtothenotetaker]shethoughtyouwasacoer’ark,sir.

thenotetaker

[withquickinterest]whatsacoer’ark?

thebystander

[inaptatdefinition]it’sa--well,it’sacoer’ark,asyoumightsay.whatelsewouldyoucallit?asortofinformer.

theflowergirl

[stillhysterical]itakemybibleoathineversaidaword--

thenotetaker

[overbearingbutgood-humored]oh,shutup,shutup.doilooklikeapoliceman?

theflowergirl

[farfromreaured]thenwhatdidyoutakedownmywordsfor?howdoiknowwhetheryoutookmedownright?youjustshewmewhatyouvewroteaboutme.[thenotetakeropehiookandholdsitsteadilyunderhernose,thoughthepreureofthemobtryingtoreaditoverhihoulderswoulduetaweakerman].whatsthat?thataintproperwriting.icantreadthat.

thenotetaker

ican.[reads,reproducingherpronunciationexactly]"cheerap,kepti’bawyaflahrorfaporegel."

theflowergirl

[muchdistreed]it’ecauseicalledhimcaptain.imeantnoharm.[tothegentleman]oh,sir,dontlethimlayachargeagenmeforawordlikethat.you--

thegentleman

charge!imakenocharge.[tothenotetaker]really,sir,ifyouareadetective,youneednotbegirotectingmeagaitmolestatioyyoungwomenuntiliaskyou.anybodycouldseethatthegirlmeantnoharm.

thebystandersgenerally

[demotratingagaitpoliceeionage]coursetheycould.whatbusineisitofyours?youmindyourownaffairs.hewantromotion,hedoes.takingdoweople’swords!girlneversaidawordtohim.whatharmifshedid?nicethingagirlcantshelterfromtherainwithoutbeingiulted,etc.,etc.,etc.[sheisconductedbythemoresympatheticdemotratoracktoherplinth,wheresheresumesherseatandstruggleswithheremotion.]

thebystander

heaintatec.hesabloomingbusybody:thatswhatheis.itellyou,lookathioots.

thenotetaker

[turningonhimgenially]andhowareallyourpeopledownatselsey?

thebystander

[suiciously]whotoldyoumypeoplecomefromselsey?

thenotetaker

neveryoumind.theydid.[tothegirl]howdoyoucometobeuofareast?youwereborninliongrove.

theflowergirl

[aalled]oh,whatharmisthereinmyleavingliongrove?itwatfitforapigtoliveiandihadtopayfour-and-sixaweek.[intears]oh,boo--hoo--oo--

thenotetaker

livewhereyoulikeutstopthatnoise.

thegentleman

[tothegirl]come,come!hecanttouchyou:youhavearighttolivewhereyouplease.

asarcasticbystander

[thrustinghimselfbetweenthenotetakerandthegentleman]parklane,foritance.idliketogointothehousingquestionwithyou,iwould.

theflowergirl

[suidingintoabroodingmelancholyoverherbasket,andtalkingverylow-iritedlytoherself]i’magoodgirl,iam.

thesarcasticbystander

[notattendingtoher]doyouknowwhereicomefrom?

thenotetaker

[promptly]hoxton.

titterings.popularinterestinthenotetaker’erformanceincreases.

thesarcasticone

[amazed]well,whosaidididnt?blyme!youknoweverything,youdo.

theflowergirl

[stillnursingherseeofinjury]aintnocalltomeddlewithme,heaint.

thebystander

[toher]ofcourseheaint.dontyoustanditfromhim.[tothenotetaker]seehere:whatcallhaveyoutoknowaboutpeoplewhatneverofferedtomeddlewithyou?wheresyourwarrant?

severalbystanders

[encouragedbythieemingpointoflaw]yes:wheresyourwarrant?

theflowergirl

lethimsaywhathelikes.idontwanttohavenotruckwithhim.

thebystander

youtakeusfordirtunderyourfeet,dontyou?catchyoutakinglibertieswithagentleman!

thesarcasticbystander

yes:tellhimwherehecomefromifyouwanttogofortune-telling.

thenotetaker

cheltenham,harrow,cambridge,andindia.

thegentleman

quiteright.[greatlaughter.reactioninthenotetaker’sfavor.exclamatioofheknowsallaboutit.toldhimproper.hearhimtellthetoffwherehecomefrom?etc.].mayiask,sir,doyoudothisforyourlivingatamusichall?

thenotetaker

ivethoughtofthat.perhaishallsomeday.

therainhatoed;andthepersoontheoutsideofthecrowdbegintodropoff.

theflowergirl

[resentingthereaction]heogentleman,heaint,tointerferewithapoorgirl.

thedaughter

[outofpatience,pushingherwayrudelytothefrontanddilacingthegentleman,whopolitelyretirestotheothersideofthepillar]whatonearthisfreddydoing?ishallgeteumoniaifistayinthisdraughtanylonger.

thenotetaker

[tohimself,hastilymakinganoteofherpronunciationof"monia"]earlscourt.

thedaughter

[violently]willyoupleasekeepyourimpertinentremarkstoyourself?

thenotetaker

didisaythatoutloud?ididntmeanto.ibegyourpardon.yourmother’seom,unmistakeably.

themother

[advancingbetweenherdaughterandthenotetaker]howverycurious!iwaroughtupinlargeladypark,neareom.

thenotetaker

[uproariouslyamused]ha!ha!whatadevilofaname!excuseme.[tothedaughter]youwantacab,doyou?

thedaughter

dontdareeaktome.

themother

oh,please,pleaseclara.[herdaughterrepudiatesherwithanangryshrugandretireshaughtily.]weshouldbesogratefultoyou,sir,ifyoufoundusacab.[thenotetakerproducesawhistle].oh,thankyou.[shejoiherdaughter].

thenotetakerblowsapiercingblast.

thesarcasticbystander

there!iknowedhewasaplain-clothescoer.

thebystander

thataintapolicewhistle:thatsaortingwhistle.

theflowergirl

[stillpreoccupiedwithherwoundedfeelings]heorighttotakeawaymycharacter.mycharacteristhesametomeasanylady’s.

thenotetaker

idontknowwhetheryouvenoticedituttheraitoedabouttwominutesago.

thebystander

soithas.whydidntyousaysobefore?anduslosingourtimelisteningtoyoursilline.[hewalksofftowardsthestrand].

thesarcasticbystander

icantellwhereyoucomefrom.youcomefromanwell.gobackthere.

thenotetaker

[helpfully]hanwell.

thesarcasticbystander

[affectinggreatdistinctionofeech]thenkyou,teacher.hawhaw!solong[hetoucheshishatwithmockreectandstrollsoff].

theflowergirl

frighteningpeoplelikethat!howwouldhelikeithimself.

themother

it’squitefinenow,[shegathersherskirtsaboveheranklesandhurriesofftowardsthestrand].

thedaughter

butthecab--[hermotherisoutofhearing].oh,howtiresome![shefollowsangrily].

alltheresthavegoneexceptthenotetaker,thegentleman,andtheflowergirl,whositsarrangingherbasket,andstillpityingherselfinmurmurs.

theflowergirl

poorgirl!hardenoughforhertolivewithoutbeingworritedandchivied.

thegentleman

[returningtohisformerplaceonthenotetaker’sleft]howdoyoudoit,ifimayask?

thenotetaker

simplyphonetics.thescienceofeech.thatsmyprofeion:alsomyhoy.hayisthemanwhocanmakealivingbyhishoy!youcaotanirishmanorayorkshiremayhirogue.icalaceanymanwithiixmiles.icalacehimwithintwomilesinlondon.sometimeswithintwostreets.

theflowergirl

oughttobeashamedofhimself,unmanlycoward!

thegentleman

butistherealivinginthat?

thenotetaker

ohyes.quiteafatone.thisisanageofutarts.meegininkentishtownwith?0ayear,andendiarklanewithahundredthousand.theywanttodropkentishtowuttheygivethemselvesawayeverytimetheyopentheirmouths.nowicanteachthem--

theflowergirl

lethimmindhisowusineandleaveapoorgirl--

thenotetaker

[explosively]woman:ceasethisdetestableboohooingitantly;orelseseektheshelterofsomeotherplaceofworship.

theflowergirl

[withfeebledefiance]ivearighttobehereifilike,sameasyou.

thenotetaker

awomanwhoutteruchdepreinganddisgustingsoundshaorighttobeanywhere--norighttolive.rememberthatyouareahumaeingwithasoulandthedivinegiftofarticulateeech:thatyournativelanguageisthelanguageofshakeearandmiltonandthebible;anddontsittherecrooninglikeabiliouigeon.

theflowergirl

[quiteoverwhelmed,andlookingupathiminmingledwonderanddeprecationwithoutdaringtoraiseherhead]ah-ah-ah-ow-ow-ow-oo!

thenotetaker

[whiingouthiook]heave!whatasound![hewritethenholdsoutthebookandreads,reproducinghervowelsexactly]ah-ah-ah-ow-ow-ow-oo!

theflowergirl

[tickledbytheperformance,andlaughingiiteofherself]garn!

thenotetaker

youseethiscreaturewithherkertoneenglish:theenglishthatwillkeepherintheguttertotheendofherdays.well,sir,inthreemonthsicouldpathatgirloffasaducheatanambaador’sgardearty.icouldevengetheraplaceaslady’smaidorshopaistant,whichrequireetterenglish.thatsthesortofthingidoforcommercialmillionaires.andontheprofitsofitidogenuinescientificworkihonetics,andalittleasapoetonmiltoniclines.

thegentleman

iammyselfastudentofindiandialectand--

thenotetaker

[eagerly]areyou?doyouknowcolonelpickering,theauthorofokeacrit?

thegentleman

iamcolonelpickering.whoareyou?

thenotetaker

henryhiggi,authorofhiggi’suniversalalphabet.

pickering

[withenthusiasm]icamefromindiatomeetyou.

higgi

iwasgoingtoindiatomeetyou.

pickering

wheredoyoulive?

higgi

/pickering

i’ /higgi

rightyouare.

theflowergirl

[topickering,ashepaesher]buyaflower,kindgentleman.i’mshortformylodging.

pickering

ireallyhavntanychange.i’msorry[hegoesaway].

higgi

[shockedatgirl’smendacity]liar.yousaidyoucouldchangehalf-a-crown.

theflowergirl

[risingindeeration]yououghttobestuffedwithnails,youought.[flingingthebasketathisfeet]takethewholebloomingbasketforsixpence.

thechurchclockstrikesthesecondquarter.

higgi

[hearinginitthevoiceofgod,rebukinghimforhiharisaicwantofcharitytothepoorgirl]areminder.[heraiseshishatsolemnly;thenthrowsahandfulofmoneyintothebasketandfollowickering].

theflowergirl

[pickingupahalf-crown]ah-ow-ooh![pickingupacoupleofflori]aaah-ow-ooh![pickingueveralcoi]aaaaaah-ow-ooh![pickingupahalf-sovereign]aaaaaaaaaaaah-ow-ooh!!!

freddy

[ringingoutofataxicab]gotoneatlast.hallo![tothegirl]wherearethetwoladiesthatwerehere?

theflowergirl

theywalkedtothebuswhentheraitoed.

freddy

andleftmewithacabonmyhands.damnation!

theflowergirl

[withgrandeur]neveryoumind,youngman.i’mgoinghomeinataxi.[shesailsofftothecab.thedriverputshishandbehindhimandholdsthedoorfirmlyshutagaither.quiteunderstandinghismistrust,sheshewshimherhandfulofmoney.]eightpenceaintnoobjecttome,charlie.[hegriandopethedoor].angelcourt,drurylane,roundthecornerofmicklejohn’soilshop.leteehowfastyoucanmakeherhopit.[shegetsinandpullsthedoortowithaslamasthetaxicatarts].

freddy

well,i’mdashed!